Reconnect To A Lost Friend | Where are you today?
My Dear Lost Friend | What Became of you?
Despite social media, tracing people UK isn’t made any easier than say 30 years ago to stay in touch. Lost friends-young people age (20-30) are renowned to be amongst the worst culprits for not staying in touch.
People in this age group are very mobile. Such as job changes, moving to different parts of the country taking on new sets of friends, etc. Then one day it dawns on them, they have not heard in ages from someone an old friend, who once used to message them daily.
Reconnect To A Lost friend | Where did you go?
Usually, it’s not down to a loss of interest. These things inexplicably often ‘just happen. It’s genuinely not a lack of sincerity or that they have upset you/ in some way.
But we do of course feel guilty and this can make it somewhat tricky to pick up the mantle again. Often what happens is; we put it off- postpone it.
Then suddenly it dawns on us. You .may have possibly lost that true and lovely friend-forever. The one you can have a real and proper gossip about the old days.
Link up again with a lost friend- how to approach it
1. Be open and honest. Do not over-do- it and keep it low-key.
To reconnect to a lost friend, initially, we suggest sending a simple text message “Hi just to let you know I am thinking about you. How is going and what you been up to?” No more and no less, and no explanation as to why no communication then see if there is any reaction. This can come later down the line.
2. Assuming a positive response
Get the issues of ‘long time without communications’ out of the way early. Be totally frank as to the long silence. We suggest putting it to them as follows: “I know it’s been quite a while and I do feel very guilty about it and it has bothered me for some time.
But if I did not care logically I would not have reached out to you again”.
In my defence, each day seemed to merge into another
Also, I was forever occupied with something new to tackle. This could mean a new job, new location, new circle of friends, new baby and so on.
But I am here with you now! At the same time without actually ‘saying it’ they could have reached out to you as well but didn’t.
Make the point (if you mean it) that you will never let that person go out of your life ever again. Make a point of asking more questions about how their life has been than going on about yourself.
3. Reconnect to a lost friend –Set some specific dates for the future.
Towards the end of that first meeting, after a long time had elapsed, it would be good to cement it with a definite future date to meet.
It would not go down well to leave it loose, such as: give us a ring sometime”. This sounds like a vague ‘maybe one day in the future’.
These few words could kill it forever. INSTEAD, It will need a firm time and date.
A Friend You lost touch with it sounds like a polite but empty thing to say. Even though you may actually mean it. Unfortunately, it rings of a put- off!
Do not at this juncture make it an elaborate meeting and “meet all my new friends” together approach. Especially If you once had a special one-one relationship, to be dumped into a large pool of finds when they don’t know anyone is somewhat intimidating and overbearing.
4. Showing that you meant what you said.
Once you have re-tied the fragile connections again then make sure you show you are really determined to retain them. What better than to do something different which is a gesture of yesteryear?
How about a handwritten letter, or a lovely old-style postcard. Include in it some of the style of humour you once had towards each other. After all, a big part of your original bond of friendship was to make each other laugh.
Here you have a huge advantage because you are not strangers you share a history. Indeed the same humour and likes and dislikes will all come out again and lead to the same bouts of laughter as before. In many ways picking up where you both left off.
5. Accept things have changed.
Of course, you are still friends, however, some considerable time has passed since you last met. See how both of you have changed (if at all) how you are both still alike and also how different. Then decide if you can and wish to give it a second-go.
It’s been quite a while and I do feel very guilty about it. In fact, it has bothered me for some time.
Yes I do care
But if I never, ever cared, about you, then logically I would not have reached out to you again”. In my defence, each day seemed to merge into another and I was forever occupied with something new to tackle.
This could mean a new job, new location, new circle of friends, new baby, and so on. But I am here with you now! At the same time without actually ‘saying it’ they could have reached out to you as well but didn’t.
Make the point (if you mean it)
You will never let that person go out of your life ever again. Make a point of asking more questions about how their life has been than going on about yourself.
Do not at this juncture make it an elaborate meeting and “meet all my new friends” together approach. Especially If you once had a special one-one relationship, to be dumped into a large pool of finds when they don’t know anyone is somewhat intimidating and overbearing.
In conclusion, our opinion is: it’s always worth giving it a try. Here is a link to learn more about us.
https://friendsreconnected.co.uk/ Contact: Tel: 07561 698 453 email: friendsreconnecteduk@gmail.com
Link to useful site missing people
