How can I find someone? – Find someone I lost touch with
Find someone I lost touch with
How to find someone
How can I find someone? Along the way we lose them through our own stupidity, petulant juvenile rows, relocating, and to naturally new friends evolving over the course of time.
But even though they may be lost, hope is not. The key is to keep them in your heart and then when the time is right, pick up the friendship once again where you left off.
Tracing Old Friends. The friend who you lost touch with – will find their way home if you leave the light on for them. Either way, retaining cherished memories of your lost friend, and the good times you once shared is quite magical.
Find old friends
To find someone you lost touch with such as a long-lost friend, from school, or an ex sweetheart, first love. We all at some time experience losing friends.
Either by choice, death, geographic location, length of time since last in contact, petty arguments, jealousy etc. However, our true and real friends are intertwined into each other’s hearts forever.
Often the desire to reconnect just needs a bit of a push to kick-start it again. Both sides may be keen to reconnect, but at the same time and understandably somewhat anxious the other side might rebuff them.
The most important thing is to leave the light on. Thus helping a lost friend find their way home to you.
In the case of a lost love
We are left with a memory that no one else can steal and a heart no one else can fix. We have to accept it was not meant to be and live with any ensuing regrets.
Although having said that memories of a lost sweetheart are often virtually impossible to erase. Nor the regrets, and recrimination about our own stupidity in losing that person.
There are many who question the wisdom of rekindling a lost sweetheart, and for some, it is unfinished business. Actually, we have learned the desire to reach out once again increases over time, instead of diminishing.
What are the chances of a successful reunion with a lost love? In our opinion, no more than 50/50. But having been presented with these statistics OK, so, you still want to give it a go!
How to find someone you lost touch with
At the very beginning, we suggest going back as far as you can. To times and places where you first met and spent time together. Begin at the beginning.
- Write everything down. There is nothing worse than recollecting some vital pieces of information, and then- to forget it. Sadly something which happens more often in older age.
- The vital information would be as follows:- Friends’ full name. Address, names of parents, brother and sisters, any mutual friends. Schools attended- workplaces etc. Social clubs, names of any Platonic boy or girlfriends.
3. Armed with some or all of this information are the building blocks towards a successful trace. But do not despair In many cases almost all the above information we ask for is not available. This does not in any way mean the job is not doable just that it becomes more challenging-shall we say.
Assuming you possess some or indeed all the information we described above you are good-to-go.
However, even where you have gathered together all the information we suggested, despite what others might claim, there is still no more than a 50/50 chance of finding your lost friend. We know from experience there will be numerous criss-cross different permutations and numerous main dead-ends you could encounter. However, this is a good basis for your search.
We begin by a search for births, marriages, and deaths
Births show (of course) dates and location of birth. It also shows the names of parents and the maiden names of the mother and any siblings. The maiden name of the mother reveals the other side of the family. These potential names of aunts, uncles and their siblings give us an extra dimension. Especially useful, if we hit a ‘brick wall’ elsewhere.
Marriage shows date and location and usually full names of both parents
Names of brothers and sisters are very useful too. Especially if it’s a female you are searching for. It helps where they married and then subsequently divorced.
Often you cannot pick up on a new married surname. So we search for a brother or sister, who ‘would’ probably know. Preferably a brother as its rare the male changes his surname.
Although we have found quite often the sibling is reluctant to pass on this information without first seeking approval from the person you are searching for. So the element of surprise is lost, and they may simply say NO!
You might try Facebook. However, we have not achieved much success here.
The only other option apart from advertising in various newspapers is to go to various reunion sites, or revisiting areas where you once spent time together. Or knocking on doors of people whom you recall who once knew them.
Other than that would be to employ a professional people search agency. There are quite a few out there, but we do not know how effective they are. Plus of course, there is a cost.
So, don’t give up! Your lost friend may be as keen to hear from you, as you are to hear from them!
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